Every harsh winter has a quiet spring.
It was something their mother had said, when she and Markōs had acted out as children. They had been the twin terrors of the palace grounds. But, she recalled, their mother rarely got mad at them, and even when she did, she never stayed mad. Even the roughest storms must pass, and there would be a time for kindness.
She didn’t know if she believed it, but she held onto the memory.
In the thin, pre-dawn light, she rose and packed her bags. Everyone else had left the old, abandoned estate, either to return to their homes and families, or abroad, fleeing recent memories. This place was my home, or what passed for it, she thought as she broke open the last barrels of lantern oil and soaked the dusty, rubble-strewn rooms. I suppose I have a family too… I spent so long thinking I was alone. But would they welcome a murderer to their side? Would she be comfortable in that life again?
No, she decided, and lit a match.
Kosul had changed, even in the few weeks since the coronation. The air was no longer heavy with smoke or tension. People spoke freely to one another in the market once again. Many who supported the Usurper, who looked the other way as he had run rampant, still walked freely, as citizens. There’s little I can do, now. The thought made her burn with fury.
The country was quieter, as people returned to their farms and their shops. They were ready to return to order, to normalcy. To their lives. And what is normal for me? She considered. The answer hurt. She had been forged in Yushkov’s Kosul, a place built on blood and strength and guile. Maybe I’m still there, she thought as she cleaned her rifle, running a cloth along the pitted, scarred barrel.
Kosul needed healers and politicians. Not blood-drenched fighters.
It was still early when she turned her back on the ashes and faced the sunrise. Kosul was healing, or at least changing.
She hoped she could do the same.
"每一个残酷的冬天都会迎来一个详和的春天."
正如同她的母亲说过的,当她和马库斯(?)还是孩童的时候.她们就是王宫里的小恶魔.但在她的回忆里,她们的母亲几乎就没有对她们生气过.即使有时生气了,也不会持续很久.哪怕是最凛冽的狂风也会过去,之后便是一段安宁祥和的好时光.
她不知道自己是否同意这句话,但她深深记得它.
在微弱昏暗的灯光下,她起身收拾好行李.所有人都离开了这座被废弃了的老庄园,有些人回到了自己的家庭,有些人远走他乡,试图忘记这段记忆."但这里是我的家,至少曾经是的,"她这样想着,打开了最后一桶灯油,浇到这个号充满灰尘的阴暗的小屋.我也想有个家...我认为我已经独自一个人太久了.但他们会欢迎一个凶手在他们身边吗?她会对那样的日子感到满意吗?
不,她下定决心,然后点亮了火柴.
姑苏已经改变,即使加冕礼只过去了短短数周.但这里的空气已经不再充满战火和紧张.人们再一次可以和其他人在市场自由地交流.然而仍然有一些支持篡位者的人,对这些改变熟视无睹,仍然可以像一般市民一样猖獗的自由行走.现在的我对此无能为力,但愤怒却在她的心头燃烧.
历史在向前行走在.
城市在回归平静,人们回到了他们的农场和商铺,开始像往常一样接收订单.他们回到了他们的生活,但什么是我正常的生活呢?她思考这个问题,而答案很是伤人.她已经忘掉那个在约什科夫统治下的姑苏,那个建立在鲜血和暴力以及阴谋之上的城市.或许我还没有离开那里,她这样想着,拿起那块满是补丁,伤痕累累的布块,擦干净她的小刀,
姑苏需要一个治疗者和一个政治家,而不是一个沾满鲜血的战士.
当她转身背对灰烬面向朝阳时,这一切才刚刚开始.姑苏还在恢复中,至少还在改变.
她希望她能做到.